Poetry + Capitalism = Shit

One of my more interesting Christmas gifts was a Body Wash by Addidas. I have no gripes about it, it smells good and it has caffeine in it which oddly wakes me right the fuck up when I roll out of bed. However, upon closer examination I found this on the back side of the tube:

I feel the surge of cool mint, the jolt of caffeine.
Clean relief washes over me. I feel the burst of energy.
My only wish: Make it last forever.

This is so terrible, so absolutely mind numbing that I suggest we hold a moment of silence to remember the disgust you had upon first reading that.....

My only wish- make the vomit in the back of my throat go away. That was SOOO unbelievably fucking stupid. Are you serious? MAKE IT LAST FOREVER?? Yes, thats what I want- I want to sit and rub body wash all over myself FOREVER. I hate marketers.

Hey Addidas next time you want to sell me something why don't you hire an accused rapist, maybe he could do a better job.

Ouch, score one for greg.

Can you step? Email me.
hckyfn15@aol.com