We're All Going To Die

Al Gore Gives The Day After Tomorrow "Two Thumbs Up"

Taking time out of his schedule as the infamous loser of the 2000 Presidential election, Al Gore has settled into his new job as movie reviewer. At a recent speech railing President Bush, Gore used the movie "The Day After Tomorrow" to critique the President's environmental policy. At the event he said, "Had I been elected, I would have banned SUV's and trucks and mandated that every household own a Civic."

Questioned as to how he would have fought the so-called "Greenhouse Effect" he pointed to one of "Tomorrow's" key action sequences. "See when the sun gets really hot because we drive cars too much, the North Pole melts. If I were President, the earth would have been placed in a lockbox to prevent this catastrophe."

While it is well known that the ex-Vice President invented the internet, he also informed the crowd that he had created "the cure for pollution" but that "President Bush stole it from my lockbox."

When asked for comment White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan said, "Mr. Gore is simply wrong, this is Roland Emmerich's worst film since Godzilla and the special effects can't save a trite plot and poor acting. The President gives the film a C-."

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