I Would Rather Shoot Myself Than Join MySpace

If you like MySpace, chances are, you're boring. And stupid.

Perusing someone's myspace page is sort of like walking into a bedroom with a bunch of incoherent morons screaming "LOOK AT ME, LOL!!" over and over.

MySpace has gone to all the trouble of uniting everything I hate about the internet into one convenient page to piss me off.

A. The Blog - I've covered this area numerous times. The only blog I like is mine. I don't give a shit about how your boyfriend is mean. I don't give a shit about your parents grounding you. AND NO ONE LIKES YOUR SHITTY POETRY. SAY SOMETHING INTERESTING.

P.S. " :- D " IS NOT A FUCKING WORD.

B. The Photo Gallery - Wow. Ten photos of your souped up car. Ten of your girlfriend. One of you holding a beer. Congratulations, you've asserted your masculinity to the whole world tough guy.

C. The Profile - It's so rewarding that at any given time I can find out my friend is a Taurus, whose favorite movie is Fast and the Furious and that he/she likes salad. That's deep. Thanks MySpace!

D. The Comment Section - Here's a real winner. I challenge anyone to go more than a paragraph without finding an enlightening phrase like, "Is she single LOL nah?" or (and this a verbatim copy and paste)

"omfg ur still working there lol, well actually thats really good that u CAN keep a job, lol unlike some people, gl witht that tho, so if it pays u well, can i borrow 30$ LOL, btw what server do u play on?"

STAB YOURSELF WITH YOUR MOUSE. THE EXTRA SECOND TO TYPE OUT BY THE WAY WON'T KILL YOU SHITHEAD. YOUR ENGLISH TEACHER JUST SHOT HERSELF.

LEARN TO READ AND WRITE AGAIN.

MySpace should be shutdown and anyone who joined should be slapped with a yardstick.
Get a job. Go to college.

Can you step? Email me.
hckyfn15@aol.com